4 Horn Review for A Thousand Words - PLEASE READ ON -- Plus Wanderlust, The Lorax, Silent House

The past few weeks have been tough.  I have been experiencing some medical issues that have really kept me from the keyboard.  I can't even apologize for my absence, because it truly has been that rough a go.  

The upside is that with everything going on, I have been able to see some flicks...some posts I open by saying I am going to be short, and write all night.  This time, I am going to be short, really.

Wanderlust: 4 of 5 Horns -- A really funny movie that is both a great statement on what is important in life while also being quite hilarious.  Plus, this is movie that gave us Justifer Anitheroux.... :-)  Tony, that one's for you.  Justin Theroux was spectacular as the guru.  Paul Rudd and Jennifer Aniston had great chemistry and Rudd was in great form, with some great outtakes included during the credits.  And the supporting cast was phenomenal, Alan Alda included.  Check this out for a fun, R-rated run through the theater.

Silent House: 3 of 5 Horns -- This movie had me at hello.  A film shot to emulate a single take from start to finish, and it worked.  It worked great.  Elizabeth Olsen continued channeling the talent she exuded in Martha Marcy May Marlene and for my money, she is by far my favorite Olsen, my childhood love of Full House excluded.  I really thought as a home invasion film, things were working very nicely.  It was set up perfectly and it could have finished just as solid.  But the train came off the rails a bit, and without spoiling it, I can just tell you that this film will not take you where you think it will.  I will say that a girl in my theater started crying at one point she was so afraid, there were a variety of scream out loud moments, and that there were many groans heard from throughout the theater when the film made its reveal.  

The Lorax: 4.5 of 5 Horns -- Yes, it is a movie with a message, but what is wrong with that, I ask?  This movie is well made with great 3-D and animation.  The story runs perfectly from beginning to end and it is appropriate for all ages.  It has cleared $129 million in 12 days domestically, which ain't too shabby.  The story is sweet and true and timely, and for a Dr. Suess adaptation, I think it may be the best of them yet.

A Thousand Words: 4 of 5 Horns -- This film sits at the hallowed spot of 0% on Rotten Tomatoes.  Yes, you read that correctly....0%.  This is a shining example of when we as film goers have to look past the critical bullshit and think about what really makes a good movie.

Eddie Murphy has a stigma that he will likely carry with him for the rest of his life.  He has Sherman Klump and Norbit to thank for that.  Meet Dave and Pluto Nash didn't help.  But he also has James "Thunder" Early and most of what he did before 1990 as proof that he has true talent and is a stupendously funny man.  And for the record, I can watch Pluto Nash anytime day or night and be a happy man...check it out again and give it another chance.

Well A Thousand Words is a high-concept film, that much is certain.  A fast-talking literary agent (Murphy) tries to woo a spiritual guru as a client, and in the process, the universe sets its sights on him.  He becomes spiritually linked to a tree, and when he speaks, a leaf falls from the tree.  The characters guess at the endgame that when all the leaves drop off, the tree will die, and so will Murphy's Jack McCall.

Forget that Murphy is actually funny from start to finish in this film.  Forget that the talented Clark Duke is also hilarious from start to finish with loads of screen time as MCCall's assistant Aaron.  Cliff Curtis is great as the guru Sinja and Kerry Washington is both gorgeous and accurate in her portrayal of a frustrated wife.

Why is this film hated by the critics?  It is at 60% "liked" by the users on Rotten Tomatoes and while not great, it is at 4.7 on IMDB.

This film tells the story of a man who takes everything for granted and has the only tool he thinks he has in this world taken from him, his power of slick speech.

He has to overcome problems with his family, his mother, his job, and most importantly, himself.

Things get silly at times, as he is relegated to charades to communicate to keep that tree leafy.  Most entertaining are his interactions with 30 Rocks Jack Brayer as a Starbucks employee.  

Eddie Murphy silliness is a good thing in small doses, and for the length of this film, it is a manageable amount here.  Don't forgo this film because of the critics, give it a chance.

I feel that as a character, we grow with Jack McCall and I like the journey on which we are taken.

Yes, I have some weighty things happening in my life right now, so maybe it touched me a little deeper than your average joe, but this is no 0% film.

Please...give this movie a chance.  You will not regret it!  Go in with an open mind...stay the course!

(I hope.)

Until later, take care gang...

Reel Rhino

TOWER HEIST Review and Am I an Ass...don't answer that.

So I'll cut to the "I'm an Ass" part first.  I did go and see Tower Heist this evening.  I would like to think that for around 150 movies at the theater a year, that I am a sensitive movie goer.

I hate when folks bring loud and inappropriate aged kids to the theater.

I hate when cell phones aren't set to silent and when these phones do ring, the person who owns it can't seem to sort out:  --a) where the phone is, and   --b) how to stop the phone from ringing in the darkened environment of the theater.

Even more so, I hate so very much, when people actually answer the phones in the theater.  Are you kidding me...you are really answering the phone...

"Hello"

"I'm at the movies..."

"I'll call you back later..."

"Yeah, okay, I'll meet you there..."

"Tell Bob I said hi..."

"Okay....okay...okay....bye."

Cardinal rule...you don't answer your phone at the theater.  I am on call, 24/7/365.  Usually 5 or 6 times a year, I will have a movie interrupted by a call out.  When my phone "rings," at the theater, it is set to silent.  I get up, press answer, and let the person on the other end of the phone listen to the movie as I walk out of the theater.

Bottom line, I hate inappropriate disruptions at the theater.

I am a considerate movie goer, but apparently today, I stepped over one man's line.

When the credits were approximately 3/4 of the way through, I pulled out to update the Media Stinger page.  If you don't use it yet, be sure to check out MEDIA STINGER to see what movies have scenes during or after the credits.  I use it for every flick I go see, to see if it will benefit me to stay until the lights come on.  I contribute when I can, and I got credit for getting the Stinger submission for Tower Heist, but not without a price.

When I pulled out my phone, and this was the first time it was out since the trailers ended, within seconds, a man sitting two seats to my right stood up, tried to tough guy tower over me, and said "THANKS FOR HAVING YOUR PHONE OUT DURING THE MOVIE!"  Caps indicate his tone, and I was quite frankly, flabbergasted.

My quick retort was: "I didn't!" to which he said "IT IS OUT RIGHT NOW!" 

I should have just uttered: "NUHHH UHHHHHH, POPPY PANTS!," but what I actually said was that I thought he was a real joy to be around and told him to get out of my face.  Now I have been losing weight, but at 335, I am still quite formidable.  He left immediately and no blood was shed or blows were thrown.  I was angry, but I still have self-restraint.

My statement regarding this interaction is this: for my agitation at others during a movie, I consider the trailers and the credits fair game for cell phone use, especially when there are no stingers at hand. 

I was sorry that this jackalope was upset and had he handled it differently, I would have apologized in kind.  But I stand by my take on credits rolling cell phone usage.

What say you Reel Rhinoites?  What are your boundaries for theater etiquette?  What is your worst disturbance at the theater story?

Mine relates to an infant child crying through the duration of Drag Me To Hell.  That screaming infant helped me on my own personal descent into hell...what theater behavior has got your goat...let me know in the comments or via e-mail, and if I get a good enough response, I'll do a follow up post.

Now, on to the show...

TOWER HEIST 3.5 of 5 Horns

This was a passable entry into the adventure heist comedy genre.  I will say that if this was an R-rate flick (it was PG-13), that Eddie Murphy would officially be back.  For what he could spout in this milder environment, he was channelling very well, a similar vibe he had in Trading Places, the 1983 classic Eddie Murphy/Dan Aykroyd flick.  If you've never seen it, stop reading right now and go do it.  I mean it!

Okay, welcome back.  

Brett Ratner specializes in movies that seem to avoid risk, giving us much of the same old stuff, rather than anything resembling new ideas.  I don't say that to be mean, but I find his films so middle of the road.  Not since 1998, when he gave us the original Rush Hour, did he really impress me as a director...Rush Hour the first was well paced and funny as hell.

Even Red Dragon (2002) and X-Men: The Last Stand (2006) were based on previous properties and in both instances, these missed the bar set forth by their predecessors.

There really is an all-star cast here: Ben Stiller, Eddie Murphy, Alan Alda, Michael Pena, Tea Leoni, Judd Hirsch, Matthew Broderick, Casey Affleck, and Gabourey Sibide.  For as great as that sounds, they all deliver fair performances, but Murphy and Sibide stand above the others, by far.

From IMDB: When a group of hard working guys find out they've fallen victim to a wealthy business man's (Alda)  Ponzi scheme, they conspire to rob his high-rise residence. 

Alda is a penthouse pimp who is adored by the staff at his high end apartment tower.  The bend to his every whim until they find out he is being charged with securities fraud, an investigation being led by Tea Leoni's free spirited FBI Agent.   

Our hero is Stiller's character, the apartment manager who is fired after taking out some aggression on Alda when he finds out they have been swindled.  He was canned along with Casey Affleck and Pena, and the three of them hatch a plan to get it all back, but they need help.

Broderick is evicted from the apartment, a former market expert, and he is brought in for his expertise.  

Murphy is a low level criminal who Stiller knows as a neighbor, and he is brought in as the expert in all things criminal.

Round out the gang with Sibide, a disgruntled maid who is about to be deported for an expired work Visa, and the gangs all here.

The vehicle for the MacGuffin (the cash) in this movie is a bit interesting, but I won't spoil it here.  The fact that the backdrop for this film is an apartment along the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade route, is also interesting.

Really that is a good way to describe this movie: interesting.

It is an interesting movie with a great cast, but the movie is never brought to the sum of its parts.  It is like Oceans 14, without Clooney or Pitt, and not nearly as good as any of Soderbergh's offerings.  I enjoyed seeing this, especially due to the resurgence of the Eddie Murphy I remember from my youth...here's hoping we can get this guy into an R-rated flick soon.  If they reboot Beverly Hills Cop with a rumored sequel, if it is PG-13, I will protest.

No more Meet Dave, no more Imagine That, no more Norbit...get back to the good stuff, baby.  And for the record, I am a Pluto Nash apologist...yep, like it a lot.  Get over it folks...it was the last time Randy Quaid was funny and overall, it is much more fun than anyone give it credit for.

Until later, have a Very Harold and Kumar Christmas...maybe that's up next for me...maybe Anonymous.  I haven't decided yet.  Who knows what the weekend will hold...just hopefully it doesn't involve any more verbal lashings by codgery old men.  A boy can dream...

Reel Rhino